We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize
