Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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