Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart