Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
