I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
