If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
