You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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