He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Randomize
