I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
