worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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