i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
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Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
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