I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
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