Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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