I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Randomize
