I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
