STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
