I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Randomize
