So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
We just shotgunned beers for America
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
