your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Barsexuality is the new black.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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