im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
