i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize