I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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