so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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