Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
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