Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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