Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
So much rum. So many feels.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
