You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
