It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Randomize
