drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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