not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize