Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
