So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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