let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
