Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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