Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
