Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
