Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
