i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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