His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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