I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
