Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
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