Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
ttyl tear gas
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Randomize
