I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize