I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
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