if you like me you must not know who I am
is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
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YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
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