Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
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