You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
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