Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Randomize
