Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
