That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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