that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
